“I say all of this to set the stage. In my first marriage, I chose to forego celebrating Christmas in our home to honor my husband's faith. I would have honored his faith and my joy if I had it to do over. But that's not to say I'm bitter about my choices. I just see in hindsight that I did not choose balance, and I believe it would have been healthier for the marriage if I had.”
OMG! At 72 I am still looking for that balance and I can’t tell you how many times I wish I’d gotten out of this marriage at around 7 years in. But he was my 4th, and never treated me badly, and was the first man I was with that was not an alcoholic or addict. He too had been raised in a Jewish home, but had declared himself an atheist to me later on.
Two years ago on Dec. 5th I decided “I” was going to go all out for myself and decorate with a tree and everything. I had one of my sons come (he only lives barely 2 states away from me) and we cut down a tree from the woods, he helped me stand it up and decorate it. Five days later I fell and broke my hip. My husband was helpful in that he turned on the lights every morning for me when I got up, and would turn them off after I got myself to bed. And he would make sure the tree was watered when needed. But all through my healing that Christmas, that tree helped me relive some much better times of my childhood and happier times with my kids at various homes we lived in. I suppose the tree and that year, and learning to walk again was my way of finding my balance.
My kids all live out of state. I think next Christmas I am making a pact with myself to go spend a Christmas with each of them in turn.
Big hugs right back to you, Gail. I sure hope you do keep that pact for yourself next year. Life gets shorter for us all the time, so we don't have the luxury of waiting these days. And balance is something we always have the ability to learn. You can teach an old dog new tricks, I'm convinced of it. Not that we're dogs, but just going with the old quote. Wishing you a blessed holiday season. Look forward to connecting in the new year. 🎄
Something about Bing Crosby ‘s voice. Just about every song he sang became a talisman of song. I have heard he was not a very nice man in life , but his voice!! I heard of his death during my drive home on the Pasadena Freeway in 1977 and cried, wet tears, snuffles. I haven’t cried for many that way. He had stolen into my heart.
Yes, I felt the same about him, and was also saddened to hear the stories about his personality. But we can't deny he brought pleasure to many with his beautiful voice. Thanks for sharing, Leslie! 🥰
Thank you for the beautiful words. Christmas for me is both about celebrating the birth of Jesus and celebrating with family. I always decorate the house and put up the tree the day after thanksgiving. I love the joy the season brings. Merry Christmas to you and Rick.
Beautiful post and great advice for an interfaith marriage. My daughter married an Italian Catholic. I know— the only difference between Jews and Italians is the undershirt. Hehe.
They have a tree every year and I was thrilled to buy them their first real, personal ornament. Honoring both of their upbringings is important. They did this at their wedding as well. 🥰
That's awesome. We didn't have that kind of tolerance from his family, but it was a different time. Nonetheless, I did feel supported and loved. And hindsight is always a fabulous teacher. Likely if I had made myself more of a priority, they would have accepted that. I love the undershirt joke! True and funny. Enjoy your Chanukah (I never did come up with my version of how to spell it consistently.) Light a candle for me! 🕯️
THIS!!!
“I say all of this to set the stage. In my first marriage, I chose to forego celebrating Christmas in our home to honor my husband's faith. I would have honored his faith and my joy if I had it to do over. But that's not to say I'm bitter about my choices. I just see in hindsight that I did not choose balance, and I believe it would have been healthier for the marriage if I had.”
OMG! At 72 I am still looking for that balance and I can’t tell you how many times I wish I’d gotten out of this marriage at around 7 years in. But he was my 4th, and never treated me badly, and was the first man I was with that was not an alcoholic or addict. He too had been raised in a Jewish home, but had declared himself an atheist to me later on.
Two years ago on Dec. 5th I decided “I” was going to go all out for myself and decorate with a tree and everything. I had one of my sons come (he only lives barely 2 states away from me) and we cut down a tree from the woods, he helped me stand it up and decorate it. Five days later I fell and broke my hip. My husband was helpful in that he turned on the lights every morning for me when I got up, and would turn them off after I got myself to bed. And he would make sure the tree was watered when needed. But all through my healing that Christmas, that tree helped me relive some much better times of my childhood and happier times with my kids at various homes we lived in. I suppose the tree and that year, and learning to walk again was my way of finding my balance.
My kids all live out of state. I think next Christmas I am making a pact with myself to go spend a Christmas with each of them in turn.
Thank you so much for this post! Big Hugs! 🤗🫶🏻🫶🏻
Big hugs right back to you, Gail. I sure hope you do keep that pact for yourself next year. Life gets shorter for us all the time, so we don't have the luxury of waiting these days. And balance is something we always have the ability to learn. You can teach an old dog new tricks, I'm convinced of it. Not that we're dogs, but just going with the old quote. Wishing you a blessed holiday season. Look forward to connecting in the new year. 🎄
I love the way you decorate with intention and tradition. What a dear, sweet couple you are.
Merry Christmas Sue and may the New Year continue to bring light, love, and bliss into your life
🎄🙏💕
Thank you, Patricia! Wishing you the same. 🥰🥰🥰
Something about Bing Crosby ‘s voice. Just about every song he sang became a talisman of song. I have heard he was not a very nice man in life , but his voice!! I heard of his death during my drive home on the Pasadena Freeway in 1977 and cried, wet tears, snuffles. I haven’t cried for many that way. He had stolen into my heart.
Yes, I felt the same about him, and was also saddened to hear the stories about his personality. But we can't deny he brought pleasure to many with his beautiful voice. Thanks for sharing, Leslie! 🥰
It sounds sooo cozy. Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you, Ilona. Have a blessed holiday season.
Thank you for the beautiful words. Christmas for me is both about celebrating the birth of Jesus and celebrating with family. I always decorate the house and put up the tree the day after thanksgiving. I love the joy the season brings. Merry Christmas to you and Rick.
Same to you and Mel. Looking forward to seeing you in the new year! 🎄🎄🎄
Beautiful post and great advice for an interfaith marriage. My daughter married an Italian Catholic. I know— the only difference between Jews and Italians is the undershirt. Hehe.
They have a tree every year and I was thrilled to buy them their first real, personal ornament. Honoring both of their upbringings is important. They did this at their wedding as well. 🥰
Merry Christmas. 🎁🎄
That's awesome. We didn't have that kind of tolerance from his family, but it was a different time. Nonetheless, I did feel supported and loved. And hindsight is always a fabulous teacher. Likely if I had made myself more of a priority, they would have accepted that. I love the undershirt joke! True and funny. Enjoy your Chanukah (I never did come up with my version of how to spell it consistently.) Light a candle for me! 🕯️
This a is such a delightful festive post and your home looks gorgeous .
Thank you, Susan! I love being home. Happy holidays! 🎄
I remember that song! I loved it as a child. A simple unforgettable melody.
Yes, it very soothing. Feels like you're being rocked in a grandmother's arms.
A great post. Christmas has always been both religious and “folk” to me, because peace on earth, good will toward all works for everyone.
Thank you LIz! I appreciate your comments! Have a wonderful holiday! 🎄
You, too, Sue!